Choices…
Choices… Greeting dear friends & fellow navigators, & welcome to my world this weekend. I remember a time when I felt stuck in my life. It was not dramatic, there was not some big catastrophe to send me spiralling ~ no; & it was much quieter than this. It was the routine ~ wake up, work, swim, & repeat. Nothing was wrong, per se. On paper, it looked good. The job paid reasonably well, my friends were around & everything seemed to be in place. But deep down, something felt off. It is strange how you can live in a world you built & still feel like a stranger in it.
One day, I was driving back from the pool, & suddenly I thought: Is this it? Is this the life I am going to live? The question scared me. But what scared me even more was realizing, up until this point, I had been choosing it. Not actively, but passively. Every time I did not question the path I was on, I was saying yes to a life not fully my own. The strange thing was, no one was holding me there. I was not chained to this way of living. But I stayed; until fortunately, I was offered new jobs & relocation with company.
Not too long ago, I bumped into an old friend. After high school, we drifted apart, each living our own lives. But one day, I saw him in the street & decided to say hi. What struck me was not the nostalgia, but the realization not much had changed for him since we last spoke. He still had the same problems, the same habits. Sure, he had a job, which improved his financial situation, but it had not changed him.
This had me thinking ~ was he simply choosing to stay the same? Even though he had the means to change, he was still living the same way. Maybe the reason behind his problems was not because life was tough. Maybe he was not doing anything to make things better. He was just going with the flow, waiting for something to change him.
But life does not give us miracles ~ it gives us opportunities, & if we do not take them, we are choosing to stay exactly where we are. Every time one does not move, as I did, you choose to stay where you are.
We like to tell ourselves not making a decision is not really a decision at all. We think we are buying time, & waiting for the right moment. But life does not wait, & by not changing, we are quietly saying, I am okay with this. This is what I want. But is it? Is this really what you want?
We are often exposed to the talk about change like it is just around the corner. But somehow, the corner never comes. More money, more time ~ things rarely appear on their own. I am not saying change is easy, it is absolutely terrifying ~ staring into the unknown. We do not even know where to begin.
But if we do not take this step, life will pass by & we will be left wondering where our life went. Inaction is not a pause ~ it is a decision. It is a choice to remain in the familiar because staying put is easier than stepping into the unknown.
Some people cling to jobs which drain them, not because of being passionate, but because they are afraid of what happens if one should let go. We stay in relationships not out of love, but out of routine. Every day passes without action, we are quietly choosing the very life we say we do not want.
It is not about making a huge, dramatic shift overnight. Rather, it is about asking yourself, what am I saying yes to by not making a move? Is this the life I truly want? Standing still is an illusion. It feels like you are moving, but in reality, it is the world moving forward while you are left behind.
The path ahead is not fixed, & your story is not written in stone. Every moment, every conversation, every day ~ whether you realize it or not you are making choices. The real question is, are you choosing what is best for you, or are you simply choosing the comfort of not changing?
Because at the end of it all, we rarely regret the things we did ~ we regret the things we did not do. The chances we did not take, the dreams we let fade because we thought there would always be more time. But time does not wait. Life does not wait. One day, you may look back & realize the life you are living is not the one you wanted, but the one you allowed to happen. And this would not feel too nice.
Whatever you do not change, you choose. So, the real question is ~ what are you choosing today? The moment you realize what this is, everything changes.
Just few observations again dear friends, & provide an opinion in my world. Thank you for stopping by, I appreciate your being here. If my journey encourages you also, all is well with my soul. Looking forward to being back next week; this is Kenn Butler in Paradise, Nelson with best wishes.
kenn@kennbutler.comkenn@kennbutler.com
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