Falling Apart…
Greeting dear friends & fellow navigators, & welcome to my world this weekend. There are moments in our journey when we appreciate one does not know how to feel right now. There is anger raging inside your chest, but it refuses to escape. It is as if your body is burning over a pile of BBQ wood, but all you can smell is ash. You have questions… but no answer feels right.
What did I ever do to deserve this? Why do I have to hurt like this? The tears will not stop falling. The nights stretch endlessly. Every day feels like a battle. Why? WHY? How do I get through this? It feels like it is the end.
You cannot see the way out & it feels like you are losing yourself. Life feels hollow, as though you are a vessel with nothing on the inside. But on the outside, you are still as shiny as ever. You have learned to pretend ~ your smile never wavers an inch, even if a storm wreaks havoc on the inside.
But only you know the strength it takes to keep a smile in place. Only you know the secret behind those cold & distant eyes ~ they are not looking ahead, but staring into the past, lost in the warmth of memories. Your life feels frozen, paralyzed by the echoes of what once was. A deafening hum rings in your ears, drawing out everything else.
But listen closely. Deep inside, there is a voice whispering a truth you may have forgotten ~ you are the protagonist of this story.
Yes, there is a storm inside you, but it is not here to destroy you ~ it is here to transform you. No storm lasts forever & every downpour leaves behind the clearest skies. This is not about surviving the storm; it is about accepting the change it brings. Every bit of chaos is carving out space for something beautiful to bloom.
Your story is not over, not even close. So do not give up on yourself. It may feel like the end, but every time life brings you to the edge, a new chapter begins. You have faced so many battles before, & you have stood tall through them all. Why should this time be any different?
Your heart keeps fighting for you, moving blood, & one pump at a time. Your mind, though ~ it floods you, overwhelms you with noise & doubt. But perhaps, it is waiting for you to take the lead, to sift through the noise & decide what stays & what flows away.
Among all the noise, one voice truly matters: the one reminding you to trust yourself. You may not see this now, but you have what it takes to get through this. You are just too far from the ground to see the path clearly. There is a flicker of courage inside you, waiting for even the smallest act of faith to ignite into bravery.
So do not think too far ahead. Nothing will ever go as planned, & this is okay. Take it one day at a time. You will discover control is not a curse ~ it is freedom. You do not need to become the storm to make it. Instead, you are meant to move with it, to adapt & bend with its winds.
The days may not get easier, but you? You will get stronger. I know you wish you did not have to be this strong, but strength does not ask for permission. It finds you when you need it the most, while you did not choose this path, the strength will guide you through the storms you have not yet encountered. You will face life not because it is easy, but because you have already shown yourself you can.
So hold on. Do not let go of the threads. Like all things, this too shall pass. No matter how dark the clouds are today, the sun shall rise tomorrow. This will take an act of faith, but it will not disappoint. The worst has already happened. What you feared losing is already gone. Yet, you are still here. Do not give up ~ not now. Something beautiful is coming. Trust it. Trust you.
Just few observations again dear friends, & provide an opinion in my world. Thank you for stopping by, I appreciate your being here. If my journey encourages you also, all is well with my soul. Looking forward to being back next week; this is Kenn Butler in Paradise, Nelson with best wishes.
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