Stillness…
Greeting dear friends & fellow navigators, & welcome to my world today. In my article last week, I suggested it is strange how often we live everywhere except the present moment.
We live in what is sometimes called the age of rage. Some people actually search social media in hopes of finding something to get angry about. One therapist calls this “rage looking for a reason” ~ we carry our indignation along with us & look for someone to discharge it on. 1
I recall a time earlier this year, when a friend & I decided to meet for a kofi. Upon arriving at the cafe, it appeared to be closed for an event, & my friend alerted me he would be late since he had to do some unexpected chores. Since I could not contact him, I had no choice but to wait. I know my friend usually arrives early when we decide to meet up, so he was late because of something out of his control.
Hour one. I had no idea when he would arrive, so I focused attention on my experience of the present moment. As I waited, I focused on the wind on my face & how it interacted with the trees around me. The rhythmic movement of the trees created by the wind created a sense of peace within me. I thought, well, maybe this is not so bad. Before I knew it, one hour had passed, one hour in complete presence & awareness.
Hour two. The second hour was experienced with more clarity than the last. Spending a long time in presence separated from thought instilled a sense of stillness I had rarely experienced. I saw birds flying in a beautiful formation. A fly landed on my hand, & I witnessed it with no thoughts of anger clouding my perception.
At this moment, I thought, “Life is truly beautiful”. As the seconds passed, my entire experience became ever clearer. My breath, the wind in my face, the sounds of the trees, & the flow of life witnessed in pure stillness.
Hour two & a half. During the third hour, my feet were becoming sore, so I decided to walk to a nearby shop. As I walked, I was mindful of every step I took. One step after the other, time was not my enemy but simply an aspect of my experience. I enjoyed some water & went back to the same location. Once I started waiting again, I came to a simple yet insightful realization. The reason as to why I felt so alive during this two to three hour wait simply had to do with one decision. Choosing not to sell my soul.
Selling your soul is not something as complicated as signing a contract with a demon, but simply choosing to partake in mental or physical actions which decrease the presence of your spirit in the present moment. When you sell your soul because of an undesirable situation, you lose presence in this moment & submit your emotions to anger.
The presence of your soul determines how alive you are. The more you sell your soul, the less alive you feel. This also works in reverse, the less you choose to sell your soul the more alive you feel. I do not think I could have experienced my existence with such clarity & stillness if I had chosen to give in to anger. Such clarity is only possible when your soul is fully present.
During the third hour approaching an end, my friend arrived. I was delighted to see him. There was no hint of anger in my soul, for I knew he had given me the greatest gift. Absolute stillness.
Just few observations again dear friends, & provide an opinion in my world. Thank you for stopping by, I appreciate your being here. If my journey encourages you also, all is well with my soul. Looking forward to next week; this is Kenn Butler in Paradise, Nelson with best wishes.
1 Joseph Burgo, “Free Floating Rage: Borderline personality Goes Viral.”
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