Running Away…
Greeting dear friends & fellow navigators, & welcome to my world today. In my last few articles I been reflecting on New Directions, Changes, Memories, & Endings. Continuing on the same theme this week, I have been reflecting on another alternative ~ running away & the effect this may have on outcomes expected.
Some people just feel the need to run away by leaving their current lives. They pack their bags, book tickets & convince themselves a new place means a new beginning. As an alternative, if they just keep moving fast enough, the past will not catch up. Maybe the heaviness they carry will not make it to the next flight.
They change their life like shedding old skin, hoping they will feel lighter somewhere along the way. They want to have a fresh start with new faces, thinking reinvention is as simple as changing locations, & for a while, it is. The thrill of being somewhere new, the distraction of unfamiliar streets & the excitement of building a life from scratch gets to them. But not for long.
Eventually, it fades. The new city becomes another routine. The silence returns & they realize it was never about the place. Because no matter how far you go, you still have to wake up with yourself. You can change your environment by moving, but you cannot change who you are.
But not everyone runs away by leaving. Some people run by staying. They dig themselves into routines so deep they do not have to think. They wake up at the same time, go to the same job & see the same faces. They live the same day over & over until it blurs into something feeling secure.
They tell themselves they are grounded & stable. They think they are responsible, not avoiding anything. But really, they are hiding in the familiar because change is terrifying & staying put means never having to take a risk.
By keeping themselves busy, they avoid the quiet moments where the real thoughts begin to appear. They convince themselves stillness is control ~ as long as nothing changes, nothing bad can happen. But running is not about movement, rather, it is about avoidance.
Some run from their reflections. Some from mistakes they wish they could undo. Others from feelings they do not want to feel. Some escape by changing everything, while others escape by changing nothing. But at the core of it all is fear. Fear of facing whatever it is waiting in the silence. Fear, if they stop running, something heavy will catch up to them.
Maybe this is why people keep running. Not because stopping is impossible, but facing yourself is exhausting. Some days, it feels like too much. Like you would rather just keep going & doing whatever is next. But if you sit still long enough to hear all the thoughts, you do not like what they have to say?
But courage is not in running. The past is not hunting us down; it is waiting to be acknowledged. Our fears are not here to paralyze us, but to teach us. The pain is not proof we should run, but proof something inside us needs care & healing. Stopping means we are finally making space to put it all together.
Because at some point, running stops working, & no matter how far we go, we will realize what we are actually trying to escape is not outside us. It is within us. The only way forward is not to outrun it.
Rather it is to turn around & let the past be seen. It is to sit with our old selves & listen to the pain & grief, even when it is the last thing we want to do.
Because the things we run away from do not disappear.
They wait; & they will keep waiting. Until we are finally ready to face them.
Just few observations again dear friends, & provide an opinion in my world. Thank you for stopping by, I appreciate your being here. If my journey encourages you also, all is well with my soul. Looking forward to next week; this is Kenn Butler in Paradise, Nelson with best wishes.
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